Philadelphia Museum of Art - Part 4

In all honesty... the building itself is quite beautiful.

This is a comb.

This is a stupid sideways stove/fireplace

The entrance to the Mines of Moria

Which apparently leads you to a Spanish courtyard. Something tells me the dwarves of Moria were Spanish. OYE CALIENTE!

But they couldn't take the heat.

Even with the small water fountain/well

Ice Cube has turned to Pimp My Crib

But he wasn't aware of literalists bringing him cribs to be inlaid with bits of ivory, mother of pearl veneers, and a hint of gold leaf. 

Man I can't handle you walking all over the carpet. Put that ish in some GLASS!

KEEPS IT ALL PRETTY AND ISH

Shh... I may have stumbled upon Indiana Jones' latest adventure

He seems to be having a lot of trouble with taking clear photos as the entire world before him shakes.

And that shaking lead us to the exotic eastern kingdoms of China, Japan, and Korea

Where we sipped on some fine sake

And played hide and go seek in some dressers with the stereotypical nazi villain 

But it is time to retire for you and I.

Lest we have a mishap with a dog at dusk.

Philadelphia Museum of Art - Part 3

Not much to say here other than LOOK AT ALL OF THE COOL ARMOR STUFF!

Honestly, walking through this place made me feel like I was actually walking in the armories of the books I've been reading.

(Finally got through Robert Jordan's bullshit regarding the Knife of Dreams, biznitches be crazy...).

I was sort of attempting to show the relative ginormous-ness of the sword on top of this exhibit. Maybe it counts as a longsword with a hand and a half on the pommel...

Either way, that thing is ridiculous and I can only imagine the battles to be fought with that in hand. 

In fact, it seems crazier since we have the basic (perhaps misleading) understanding that humans were generally smaller then than they were now. 

The helmets certainly accentuated that fact. 

Also reminded me of my huge head and glorious amounts of lion's mane that would be too much for the helmets to handle.

But I must say that the detail on some of the helmets were gorgeous.

There was some armor for horses as well. 

I was fully convinced that there was an actual horse and person when I turned to see this unicorn.

Apparently the chestpiece on the left was made for quite the large man. AKA FAT.

They had armor and weapons along the walls as if they didn't know what to do with all of them.

When I saw the muzzle pieces I thought it was cruel to do that to a horse despite how awesome their grill bling looked. Then I noted that they probably need their mouths protected for the inevitable face slashing that goes on in battle.

Eventually made my way into the actual shields, swords, and guns section of the Philadelphia armory.

Some might say that Philly has some large balls.

...

If you didn't notice earlier, the curators of this exhibit seemed to have an intense fascination with Final Fantasy...

Turns out someone actually did make a gunblade in times past. God only knows if the thing actually worked well. 

It was still amusing to see it was separated from all of the other jam packed cases of guns, blades, and shields.

Philadelphia Museum of Art - Part 2

The museum had these entire room installations that were simply gorgeous.

It boggled my mind a bit that they were able to obtain whole rooms from another part of the planet and reassemble them here.

It's as if you get to time and place travel from the comfort of Philadelphia!

Parts from a ship. That's right. A SHIP. Arrrgh there be pirates!

The Black Pearl 

Speaking of pirates my brother made a damn cool piratey ring!

Wow this photo almost looks as if Boyfriend is popping out of a coffin. My bad on the bad rotate. 

As we wandered around and past the church pieces we found ourselves getting closer to more destructive art.

Beware the keyblades.

J/K just keys with pretty boxes to go with them.

But f'real we did start moving towards the weaponry.

Only to be tricked with more interesting furniture...

Water is the essence of wetness...

I'm a MERMAN!